Weakening

Why I always have endless tasks on hands? One haven't done, boss assigned another one. And the next day, assigned a new task again, seems like he forgot I still have non completed assignment. :( Oh ya hor.. He recalled, "never mind, that one can wait, do this first." Oh oh.. I hate that excuse. Wait wait wait... eventually, I need to complete them somehow. The longer the time, the more tasks accumulate. He never consider how many effort I needed to complete the task, always think I can do magic, all task can be completed by fingers click. I extended my working hours, try to complete the assignment by the end of the day. Everyday, I will have to deal with many unexpected issues, if I do not solve them within a day, the next day might have new issues, and next and next.... arghhhhh.... headache....

I am so tired, I feel so weak, mentally and emotionally weak. Recently, people around me keep on telling me that I look so pale. I think I really look terrible. I know my health is not in good condition. I feel tired easily, muscle aching, heart pain or suddenly short of breath. I joked with my friend, said I should prepared my will, in case I get heart attack in office and gone. But now, maybe I should consider that option seriously.

I do not know I work so hard for what?? Work for the bonus?? No no.. actual effort does not reflected in the bonus given. erm.. I guess I am too dedicated to my responsibilities. Sometimes, I wish I can close one eye, or both eyes. (-_-)

Another thing is safety issue. A colleague's car been broke in last night, at office's open car park. It was not the first time, and I think it will not be the last either. Very ironic uh.. My company produce the product for public safety sector, but the safety is alarming in the premise. What a pity world...